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200+ Funny and Clean Jokes for Kids and Families

Everyone loves a good laugh, especially kids! Yet, finding age-appropriate humor can be a challenge. This article offers a curated list of over 200 clean jokes for kids that are as funny as they are family-friendly. From knock-knock jokes to puns, these jokes are perfect for sharing laughs with your little ones.

200+ Funny and Clean Jokes for Kids

Jokes

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cow says. Cow says who? Cow says moo, not who!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and answer the door!
  3. What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-tain!
  4. Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
  5. What’s a tree’s favorite drink? Root beer!
  6. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
  7. What did the stamen say to the pistil? I like your style!
  8. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
  9. The more you take, the more you leave behind. What am I? Footsteps!
  10. What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years? The letter “M”.
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you!
  12. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
  13. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it!
  14. What do you call fake spaghetti? An “impasta”!
  15. What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!
  16. What did one plate say to the other? Lunch is on me!
  17. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
  18. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
  19. What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved!
  20. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
  21. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
  22. What’s brown and sticky? A stick!
  23. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  24. What do you call a bear caught in the rain? A drizzly bear!
  25. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
  26. What did the traffic light say to the car? Don’t look, I’m changing!
  27. What did zero say to eight? Nice belt!
  28. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!
  29. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
  30. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
  31. What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!
  32. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
  33. What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hi, bud!
  34. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
  35. Why did the kid bring a ladder to school? He wanted to go to high school!
  36. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
  37. Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
  38. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A necktarine!
  39. What did the Dalmatian say after lunch? That hit the spot!
  40. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!
  41. Why did the scarecrow adopt a dog? Because he needed a “barking buddy”!
  42. Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well!
  43. What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, they just waved!
  44. How do you organize a space party? You planet!
  45. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
  46. What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner!
  47. What’s a computer’s favorite snack? Microchips!
  48. What did one magnet say to the other? I find you attractive!
  49. What did one toilet say to the other? You crack me up!
  50. Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had drumsticks!
  51. How do you organize a cat party? You just have to pounce!
  52. Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed!
  53. What did the paper say to the pencil? Write on!
  54. What’s a ghost’s favorite fruit? Boo-berries!
  55. What did one leaf say to another? I’m falling for you!
  56. Why did the computer cross the road? To get to the other site!
  57. What did the snail say while riding on the turtle’s back? Whee!
  58. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
  59. What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-thirty!
  60. What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain? A drizzly bear!
  61. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
  62. What did one snowman say to the other? “Do you smell carrots?”
  63. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!
  64. What do you call a can that’s been opened? A can’t!
  65. How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall!
  66. Why did the music teacher go to jail? She got caught with too many sharp objects!
  67. Why did the scarecrow become successful? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  68. What did the left eye say to the right eye? “Between you and me, something smells!”
  69. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
  70. What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-tain!
  71. What’s a ninja’s favorite type of shoes? Sneakers!
  72. What did the big flower say to the small flower? Hi, bud!
  73. What’s a computer’s least favorite food? Spam!
  74. What’s the best tool to do math? Multi-pliers!
  75. What did one hat say to the other? You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!
  76. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired!
  77. What did one elevator say to the other? I think I’m coming down with something!
  78. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!
  79. What do you call a bear with no ears? B!
  80. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the United States? Nothing, it just waved!
  81. How do you make an octopus laugh? With ten-tickles!
  82. What did one penny say to the other penny? We make cents!
  83. What did the buffalo say when his son left for college? Bison!
  84. What do you call a snobbish criminal walking downstairs? A condescending con descending!
  85. How does a scientist freshen his breath? With experi-mints!
  86. What did the math book say to the history book? “You’re full of dates, and I’ve got problems!”
  87. What did one raindrop say to the other? Two’s company, three’s a cloud!
  88. What’s a moon’s favorite gum? Orbit!
  89. What did the snowman say to the snowdog? “You’re brrr-illiant!”
  90. How do you make holy water? Boil the “hell” out of it!
  91. What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved!
  92. What’s a musician’s favorite snack? A drumroll and a cymbal crash!
  93. What did one plate say to another plate? “Tonight, dinner’s on me!”
  94. How do you make a Kleenex dance? You put a little boogie in it!
  95. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
  96. What’s a tree’s least favorite month? Sep-timber!
  97. What did the football coach say to the vending machine? “I want my quarterback!”
  98. What’s a foot’s favorite snack? Sockolate chip cookies!
  99. What did the tree say to the wind? “Leaf me alone!”
  100. How do you organize a space party? You “planet”!
  101. What did one wall say to the other wall? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
  102. Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
  103. What do you call a pile of cats? A “meowtain”!
  104. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little “wine”!
  105. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
  106. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A blood orange!
  107. What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? “Close the door, I’m dressing!”
  108. What did one wall say to the other wall? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
  109. What did the digital clock say to its mother? “Look, ma! No hands!”
  110. What did one hat say to the other? “You stay here. I’ll go on ‘a-head’!”
  111. How does a penguin build its house? “Igloos it together!”
  112. Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  113. What do you call a funny mountain? Hill-arious!
  114. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a “hole in one”!
  115. What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hi, bud!”
  116. Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed!
  117. What do you call a sleeping cow? A bulldozer!
  118. What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain? A “drizzly” bear!
  119. How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall!
  120. What did one snowman say to the other snowman? “You’re cool!”
  121. Why did the chicken go to therapy? It had too many “egg-sistential” crises!
  122. What did the dog say to the tree? “Bark!”
  123. What did one egg say to the other? “You crack me up!”
  124. What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare-line!
  125. What did the ocean say to the beach? “You shore are beautiful!”
  126. What did the baseball glove say to the ball? “Catch ya later!”
  127. What did the big bucket say to the little bucket? “You look a little pail!”
  128. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
  129. What did one snowman say to the other? “Do you smell carrots?”
  130. What did the left eye say to the right eye? “Something between us smells!”
  131. How do you organize a space party? You “planet”!
  132. What did the zero say to the eight? “Nice belt!”
  133. What’s a dentist’s favorite time? Tooth hurty!
  134. Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field!
  135. What did one wall say to the other? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
  136. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
  137. What did one elevator say to the other? “I think I’m coming down with something!”
  138. What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, they just waved!
  139. What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hi, bud!”
  140. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter? Arrrr!
  141. Why did the cow give up jumping over the moon? Because it was over the moon about jumping!
  142. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
  143. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? “Where’s popcorn?”
  144. What did one wall say to the other? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
  145. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
  146. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick!
  147. Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  148. What did the spider do on the computer? Made a website!
  149. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain!
  150. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
  151. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener!
  152. What did one wall say to the other wall? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
  153. Why did the music teacher go to jail? Because she got caught with too many sharp objects!
  154. What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
  155. What did the triangle say to the circle? “You’re so pointless!”
  156. What did the stamp say to the envelope? “Stick with me, and we’ll go places!”
  157. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
  158. What do you call a snobbish criminal going downstairs? A condescending con descending!
  159. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
  160. What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hi, bud!”
  161. What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain? A drizzly bear!
  162. How do you organize a cat party? You just have to pounce!
  163. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
  164. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little “wine”!
  165. What did one raindrop say to the other? Two’s company, three’s a cloud!
  166. What do you call a funny mountain? Hill-arious!
  167. What did the football coach say to the vending machine? “I want my quarterback!”
  168. What’s a foot’s favorite snack? Sockolate chip cookies!
  169. What did the tree say to the wind? “Leaf me alone!”
  170. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain!
  171. What did the scarecrow say to the farmer? “This isn’t a field day for me!”
  172. What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, they just waved!
  173. What did one hat say to the other? “You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
  174. What’s a computer’s least favorite food? Spam!
  175. What did the left eye say to the right eye? “Between you and me, something smells!”
  176. Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed!
  177. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a watermelon!
  178. What did one wall say to the other? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
  179. Why did the scarecrow become successful? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  180. What’s a musician’s favorite snack? A drumroll and a cymbal crash!
  181. What did the zero say to the eight? “Nice belt!”
  182. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a “hole in one!”
  183. What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hare-line!
  184. What did one egg say to the other? “You crack me up!”
  185. How does a penguin build its house? “Igloos it together!”
  186. What did the digital clock say to its mother? “Look, Ma! No hands!”
  187. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A blood orange!
  188. What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? “Close the door, I’m dressing!”
  189. What did the big bucket say to the little bucket? “You look a little pail!”
  190. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
  191. What did one snowman say to the other? “Do you smell carrots?”
  192. What did one snowman say to the other snowman? “You’re cool!”
  193. How do you organize a space party? You “planet”!
  194. What did the ocean say to the shore? “You shore are beautiful!”
  195. What do you call a pile of cats? A “meowtain”!
  196. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? “Where’s popcorn?”
  197. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!
  198. What did the duck say when it bought a new lipstick? “Put it on my bill!”
  199. What do you call a frozen dog? A pupsicle!
  200. What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, they just waved!
  201. What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hi, bud!”
  202. What do you call a funny mountain? Hill-arious!
  203. Why did the cow give up jumping over the moon? Because it was over the moon about jumping!
  204. What did the triangle say to the circle? “You’re so pointless!”
  205. What did the scarecrow say to the farmer? “This isn’t a field day for me!”
  206. What did the stamp say to the envelope? “Stick with me, and we’ll go places!”

Conclusion

Remember, laughter is a universal language that fosters happiness and well-being. So the next time you’re looking to add some fun to a gathering or a quiet afternoon, these clean jokes for kids will surely bring smiles all around. Enjoy sharing them!

AboutCorinne Switzer

Corinne is an avid reader and takes a keen interest in conspiracy theories. When not busy with her day job, she likes to indulge the writer in her and pens columns on a wide range of topics that cover everything from entertainment, healthy living to healthcare and more.